Tea Time
by Remus'gal
Summary: Ed and Roy come across a cup of tea nd they find themselves turning into kittens and... shrimp...
1. Chapter 1

Tea time

Chapter 1: something a little unexpected

Edward kicked his path in front of him,frustrated. Today hadn't started well. First of all, Ed had been stuck in the military office for over 24 hours, which was now almost coming to the point where it was unbearable. The lieutenants were so annoying and loud. Esspecially Luietenant Colonel Hughes. Always shoving pictures of his family in his and Al's faces. They act like they're so busy but all they do is goof around all day long. Ed hated it here. Al, however was havng a very pleasent time at his stay with the mililtary. He got along with everyone, but especially First Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye.

" She's really nice..."Al would try to convince Ed.

" come on, Al..." Ed would sigh " All she does is fire that trigger at everyone..." Al would just ignore his elder brother and be the best he could be...

Speaking of Al, Ed hadn't seen him all day long. Usually he could hear his loud armer thrashing against the ground. It made Ed's fist clench just thinking about it._ How could have done thist to him? _This was the reason he was most depressed. Would he eve find a way to heal his brother? Ed sighed and gave the path in front of him one last hard thrash. As the end of his foot hit the hard ground, Ed winced.

" Ow..." he said, pitifully while trying to walk on one foot.

" Hey,watch yourself there, Kiddo!" came Hughes' booming voice. He had a huge smile on his face and ed could see a look of delight in his eyes past his small rectangular glasses. Ed then noticed that as Hughes got closer to him, he had hovered his hand over where his pictures were kept. Before Ed could prevent him, Hughes had shoved a photograoh of his little daughter, Elisia into Ed's face " Isn't she the most _adorable_ little thing that you've ever laid eyes on? " He asked happily. Ed shoved the picture out of his face. " Yeah, yeah... she's cute-" Hughes' face had turned from a slight frown to a big smile " You really think so? I mean it's not surprising... Everyone says that she's an angel that's landed right into my arms... So doy you think she looks like me-" Hughes was cut off by a infuriated-looking Ed. " What the hell do you want with me?" he asked angrily. Hughes' eyes widened and he slightly back away " It's just...the Colonel wants to see you..." He slightly shrugged and moved on and as he was abou to walk away from ed, he whispered something into his ear " You _seriously_ need to do something about that additude problem..."

Ed sighed deeply and began grumbling as he headed to Colonel Roy Mustang's office...

Edward slammed the door behind him vengefully, causing a loud bang which filled the whole building. A few people stared at Ed, expressions that said "what's up with you, kid?" Ed shot them dirty looks as he passed by them and made his way to a room where no one would disturb him.

After turning many corners, Ed finally found a desserted room, painted white with only a sofa and a table with a teapot beside it. Ed shrugged and slunched himself down into the sofa. He gave adeep sigh and then pouted. He had been given yet another tedious order from the Colonel. To do more distruction to other parts of the world, just to keep the state's reputation clean. Ed hated being the dog. He wished for once that he didn't have to be looked down by the Colonel but that the Colonel could be looked down by Ed. Yes...Ed did have dreams...What was so special about Mustang anyways? All he ever did was blow up stuff and ridicule other people... Always calling Ed short... "_I'll get him back, someday..."_ Ed would think. He stared intently at the white wall. It was very bland. He stared and it fo a few more moments and then his eyes moved over to the table with only the teapot on top of it.

As he looked at the teapot it made him think of when he lived in Resembloom. Auntie Pinako and Winry would always make tea for Ed and Al.

"Auntie, Why do you always make us tea?" Ed would ask

" Well... it's very good for you..." She would answer, simply.

" I drink tea, because it make me feel better!" Winry would say, joining the conversation " When I'm sad I drink tea, and it makes things much better than they were before..."

" Ah... Winry..." Ed sighed, lovingly, thinking about the girl who he grew up with. _Why can't I ever stop thinking about her? Why does she never leave my mind? ugh... _Ed shook his head out from these thoughts and got up, quickley.

"Maybe she's right..." He whispered, glancing over at the teapot and with that he set the teapot over the stove and waited...

The tea was rich. Rich and warm. Winry really was right. As the warm liquid slithered down his throught his soul lightened. Once he finished the tea he felt quite drowsy. He grinned stupidly and started muttering " Winry Rockbell... I think... I think..." and with that he thumped flat onto the sofa and fell fast asleep...

... Meanwhile with the Colonel...

Roy rolled his eyes as Fullmetal slammed the door behind him. _Maybe I shouldn't be quite so hard on him..._ he thought to himself. But it was his orders... It was his job... Roy sighed. With all the rivalry going on in the world lately it made Roy think of the days of the Ishbalan war. The days of the "killers eyes"...

He glanced over at the mass pile of papers in front of him. He pulled his head back and stared at the ceiling. He moved his eyes across his office. From photographs of him and Riza when they were young to the gigantic bookshelf to the empty- what used to be empty table. There, on the table was a teapot. Roy slightly frowned. Where had it come from? The teapot made him think of what Riza said to him one day.

" How do you stay so... together?" he asked his first Luietenant one day.

" Tea, Sir." She would respond, " Not as strong as Cofee, but gives you the right amount of energy." She would then salute him once more and then she would be off.

" Ah, Riza..." Roy sighed, lovingly. _Why can't I ever stop thinking about her? Why does she never leave my mind? _Roy tried to shake these thoughts out of his mind, but couldn't. He loved it the way she would salute him. Her four slender fingers binding there way into one and her thumb would be slightly tinted as she up raise her fingers garacefully and then...be off... He just _loved_ how she did that...

Roy slightly smiled and put the tea on a boil.

Roy smiled as he sipped the tea. It was very refreshing. It kept you in order. Made everything calm... a bit to calm... drowsy, even... Roy tried to keep his eyes open, but barely couldn't " Riza, I... I think..." and with that, his head tilted back in his office chair and fell fast asleep...

Ed sniffed the air, while his eyes were still closed. He smiled. The smell was heaven to his nose. It was the smell of- of milk. Then, Ed woke up rather abruptly. Ed hated milk. He slightly frowned and looked down at his hands, which were no longer hands but... but paws, furry blonde paws...

Roy woke up and stretched, he gave a big yawn and stretched out his hands. As he yawned, he found it rather peculiar. As he yawned, he tasted water in his mouth. He gave a frown and then looked around at his surroundings. He saw bubble around him, water bubbles. He was in a bowl of water a fish bowl. Roy's eye's widened as he looked down aat his hands. They weren't hands, they were thin segemented parts and at the end of it there was little claws. Roy glanced over at a peice of writing on the bowl. It capital letters it said: " SHRIMP".

There was silence for a few moments and then all that could be heard throughout the whole building, were long, loud, yearning "meows" and VERY loud sound of water bubbles...Yes that day, something completely unexpected had occured...

tee hee! tell me what ya think! my best friend, Evil-Ursula is going to write the next chapter so...yeah... this was sooooooooooooooooooooooo fun to write!


	2. Chapter 2

**Tea Time**

Chapter 2: It's got to be a dream

_What the hell? I'm a shrimp!_ Roy thought furiously. He looked around wildly with confusion and a bit of fear. Then it hit him...

He remembered falling asleep after drinking that tea Riza had left him. Maybe waking up was still part of the dream... If that made any sense. "This is all a dream," he reasured himself a with sigh of relief, which sent a stream of bubbles to the top of his newly found tank.

"Errm... Colonel?" Came a familiar voice from the door. Roy floated up to the top of his tank and peered over the piles of paperwork. Kain Fuery stood in the doorway with a very confused expression on his face. "I thought Miss Hawkeye said he was in here... Oh well." He muttered and then hesitated before leaving.

_Hmm. This is one weird dream... I wonder when I'm going to wake up._ Roy thought, floating back down. Before he could set his mind at ease, he heard footsteps coming down the hallway. Voices soon fallowed.

"He must be in there, Fuery. I don't think he would have gotten up and left for a date at this time of day," Came Riza Hawkeye's strong voice.

"Yes, I know. But he wasn't there when I walked in a few minutes ago," Argued Fuery, politly. Riza gave no reply.

The footsteps stopped as--Roy assumed--they entered the room. Roy peered over the papers again to see a very angry looking Riza standing in front of his desk. She looked back and forth across the room and then finally turned to face the cluttered desk. She folded her arms across her chest and gave a loud sigh. She said, "Where on earth could he be?"

"Maybe he's hiding under his desk," Fuery joked. Riza didn't laugh--as was expected. But after a moments pause she smiled. "Or maybe he's been burried by this paperwork," She said. Then muttered under he breath, "If he did it the first place we wouldn't have to worry about that."

Roy was fed up with the ridiculing from his infirior officers. "I'm right here, woman! And stop nagging me about that damn paperwork!" Another stream of bubbles went to the top of his tank and then he remembered something very important. Shrimps can't talk.

Riza peered over the stacks of paperwork and frowned. She walked around to the other side of the desk and picked up the shrimp bowl. She brought Roy up to her eye level. They looked into one anothers' eyes; red ones peering into beady black ones. Finally, Riza broke the mood. "What's a shrimp doing here?"

"Maybe it's a pet of Edward's," Came a laugh from the doorway. Jean Havoc was standing there, grinning, with his usual cigerette sticking out the corner of his mouth. Riza paid no mind to his joke. She walked over and shoved the shrimp bowl into his hands.

"Take this to Alphonse Elric. I've heard he starting a 'Pet Room.' I'm sure he'd have room for a shrimp." She said and then sent Havoc on his way.

_This really is one strange dream..._ Roy thought.

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Edward sat frozen, looking down as his... his... PAWS! What in the world was going on? Was he dreaming? Well, it couldn't hurt to find out. He heistantly put out a paw and scratched his other one.

"Yeow!" He winched. Nope... He wasn't dreaming. For some reason he had an urge to lick his wound and began to do so. His fur tasted like milk and he immediately stopped grooming himself. _BLECK!_ He thought. _I hate milk!_ Of course, he realised that milk was the least of his problems at that moment.

He closed his eyes and thought. _How the heck could this have happened... I'm not dreaming and I have somehow miraculasly turned into a cat. Great. That leaves me with no explanations whatsoever._

He opened his eyes and jumped off the couch. "I'll go find Al. He might be able to help," He reasoned and ventured off to find his brother.

After a long while of walking down hallways and trying to stay out of sight--which was easier than Ed had thought because no one seemed to be looking down--it was Al who found Edward. He scooped Edward up from behind him and hugged him close to his cold, metal chest. Ed yelped and tried to free himself from his captor's grasp before realising it was Alphonse.

"Hey! What's a kitty like you doing in a big place like this?" Al cooed, rubbing Ed behind the ear. Ed began to purr subconsiously. Al continued, "Well, I've got the perfect place for you! You'll have lots of other kitties to play with."

"Wait, Al, it's me! I don't wanna go with some other..." Ed stopped himself, realising that what he thought he was saying wasn't what Al was hearing. Instead of english, a series of meows and growls had just spilled from his lips. Al giggled, "Wow, you must be really excited."

Ed shivered. _I've got a baaaad feeling..._ He thought, uneasily.

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Note: YAY! Hilary's right, that is fun to write! Okie-dokie then, Remus'gal will be writing the next chapter for y'all! Review if possible! Bye bye!


	3. Chapter 3

okkie dokkie! Guess it's my turn again! Yay! . tee hee... anay...here we go...

Chapter 3: The Pet room

Ed bounced in Al's arms as he pranced jontily and whole-heartedly. Al seemed to be in a better aditude than usual. He had a big smile on his face( despite wearing the armor mask) as he pranced around the military office. Al would wave to anyone that he passed by and call out their names. Ed didn't know most of the people that Al had spoken to.

" How do you know all these-" Ed began, but then heard his voice. All that came out of it were loud meows.

" It's ok, kitty!" Al exclaimed happily " Were're almost there..."

Almost there? Where was he taking him?

Riza peered over the corner of the hall. " I do hope the Colonel is alright." She said it sternly, but she had a bit of a worried look on her face.

" 1st Lutienant!" saluted Fulman, facing Riza " It has been aproximately one hundred and forty minutes that the Colonel has not been present. There is no need to worry. The minutes that the Colonel can take off work a week is one hundred-" Fulman was cut off by Riza.

" That's not what I meant..." she sighed " Roy isn't the type to leave his work. He's not a slacker." She looked away as if she were thinking about something or recalling a memory.

" He's probably on another date..." chuckled Breda, and the others joined in. Riza looked at them with her firey red eyes. Her lip slightly quivered as she turned around to walk out of the room.

" You guys so immiture sometimes." she said intently and went off to do more work.

Edward still was clutched in Al's arm, when all of a sudden Al stopped in front of a large door.

" We're he-ere!" Al cooed into Ed's pionted ears. With that, Al thrust open the door and spread out his arms forcefully, which caused Ed to go flying across the room.

" Welcome to my PET ROM!" He exclaimed joyfully.

Ed had now gotten back up onto his four legs. A look of horror was spread across the furry creature's face. Ed was in the corner of a very large room filled with animals. LOTS of animals. There were cats, dogs, fish, lizards, birds, rabbits and even a few wild animals.

" I hope you like it!" said Al happily, walking towards Ed " It took me all morning to get all these-"

Al's words were cut of by Havoc who was standing in the corner of the room with a cigarette hanging losely out of the corner of his mouth, clearing his throat.

"Oh!" exclaimed Al, getting up to face Havoc " Hello Luietenant Havoc! Could I help you with anything?" Havoc chuckled as he looked around the room.

" We found a shrimp for ya'." he shrugged, handing the fish bowl with Roy in it.

" Ooooo!" Al exclaimed " I don't have one of these yet..." Roy looked blankly at Al " He's not the prettiest thing you've ever seen, is he?" Havoc chuckled and nodded his head. When Roy heard this he glared at Havoc and Al and shook his fist at them " Guess he has an aditude..." Havoc pointed out, with his cigarette half-dropping out of his mouth.

As Al set Roy down on a table, Roy caught a sight of Ed. He slightly frowned. _That thing looks firmilar_... Ed noticed the new water creature that Al was setting down on the table. _Does that shrimp have BLACK HAIR? _ he thought to himself, glancing at the shrimp oddly.

" How did you get all these animals, Alphonse?" asked Havoc.

" Well, I was starting to find a lot of animals around the Military, so I asked Mrs. Riza if I could start a room for them," Al began " Then I decided to look for stray animals around central. I found tons! It took me all morning!" _ So that's what Al's been doing all morning..._ thought Ed, annoyed.

Havoc looked around the room and turned on the balls of his feet as if he were about to leave the room when he stopped in his tracks. Havoc's gave had been caught by a small furry white rabbit. Havoc slightly smiled and came up to the furry creature and got down onto his knees. He peered at the rabbit in the eyes. The white bunny cocked its head back and forth in confusion. Havoc smiled and pulled out an orange carrot out of his pocket. The bunny took it from his hand and the stuck the carrot out of the side of his mouth like a cigarette. Havoc got up and looked down at the rabbit. " I used to have a rabbit like that when I was a kid..." Havoc smiled and turned around to walk out of the room as he walked away, he gave a wave up in the air from beind him " Bye, kid..." Al waved bye to him " Bye Lieutenant Havoc!"

Al turned around and sighed " Well, Kitty do you you like your new home?" Al asked Ed. Ed eyes widedned. He wasn't listening to Al. He was watching the bunny that Havoc was talking to. It had followed Havoc right out the door. Then the other animals began following the bunny. The Animals were running out the room and into the militay office. They were on the lose..._This cannot be good..._

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Yay! Can't wait to see what you do with the next chapter, Ursula! This is so fun...


	4. Chapter 4

Yay! My turn, my turn! How to torture Ed and Roy now? rubs hands together evilly

Chapter Four: Who's the Shrimp Now

"No!" Al howled helplessly as the animals he had worked so hard to collect spilled from the room. He scrambled after them, screaming, "Come back! COME BACK!" The large door to the Pet Room slammed shut behind him and Ed could have sworn he heard the click of it beind locked.

Ed turned his attention to the shrimp bowl that was sitting on a table near him. His stomach growled and his mouth started to water. He hadn't eaten anything for a while now and that shrimp was looking mighty tastey to his new cat eyes. Roy noticed the glint in Ed's eyes and felt his stomach tie into knots. Why is that cat looking at me like that... he thought, narrowing his eyes.

Ed lowered himself and got ready to pounce. Roy's eyes widened as he realised what was about to happen.

Sprang! CRASH! Splish, splash, splish, splash...

Ed had knocked the shrimp bowl off the table and onto the floor, where it smashed into tiny pieces and Roy was sent flying across the floor. The wind was knocked out of him so fast he nearly lost consciousness. OK, he thought. This is no dream... Then he heard the soft splish as cat paws trod over the water that was now spilled all over the floor. He felt warm breath over his body and he timidly looked up to see a large, furry, blond face peering over him.

"AAHHH! NO! BAD KITTY! DON'T EAT ME!" Roy screeched helplessly. The cat was taken aback and took a step away from the shrimp colonel.

"M-Mustang?" The cat muttered, eyes wide. Roy recognized that voice.

"Fullmetal?"

They stared at each other for a moment and then both let out a blood-curddeling scream.

Then there was silence.

Roy started to feel rather dry and hot. He was also feeling rather tired. He tried to say something witty about it, such as, "Is it just me, or does it seem a little hot in here." But all that came out was a weasy, "Water...!"

Ed snapped to attention. Right! Shrimps need water. But where is a fish bowl? He saw one on one of the low shelves and decided to use that one seeing as it was close and there were no other fish in it. He loosely picked Roy up in his mouth and took him over toward the fish tank.

"Hey!" Roy croaked. "I said don't eat me!"

"I'm not," Ed said, but it sounded strange because he couldn't move his lips with the Colonel in his mouth. He stood up on his hind legs and dropped Roy into the tank. "Happy now?" He said dryly.

Roy gave no answer. Then he changed the subject, "How do you think this happened, Fullmetal?"

Ed's ears twitched. "Dunno..." He said. "I've been trying to figure that out, but there're no reasons I can think up. And I really dout it was Alchemy. What do you think?"

"I have no idea either..."

There was an eerie silence as the two thought. Then out of the blue, Ed smirked and chuckled to himself. This earned him a suspicious look form the Colonel. Edward stooped down to eye level with Roy and he narrowed his eyes.

"So," He chuckled. "Who's the shrimp NOW?"

"Now listen here--!" Roy fumed, but was cut off when the door opened.

Hughes was standing there. He was carrying two cats and brown rabbit in his arms, looking over his shoulder and saying, "OK, Al. I'll just put these guys in here and then help you look for more." He turned his attention to the huge empty room in front of him and looked around. He whistled. "Just how many animals did Al have?" He shrugged and then walked in to put his new catches down.

He noticed Ed and Roy staring at him in the corner. He traightened up and reagusted his glasses. "Well, well, What do we have here? A kitten and a shrimp, eh?"

Roy growled, sending more bubbles to the surface of his tank. Ed chuckled, "Now you know how it feels."

Hughes walked up to them and picked Ed up and looked him in the little furry face. Suddenly, he hugged Ed tightly to his chest, nearly sufficating the poor kitten.

"Ohhh! If Elysia saw you she'd be so happy! If only I could I take you home so you could meet her! I bet you'd both get along just fine!" He squealed. He kneeled down and looked into the fish tank Roy occupied. "And I'm sure she'd like a shrimp too!"

"I know!" He exclaimed, standing up and dropping Ed in the prosess. "I'll go ask Alphonse if I can take you little guys home tonight! Elysia's gonna be so happy!" And with that, he turned and dashed out the door.

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Sorry! It's short! Deal with it. XD


	5. Chapter 5

weeeeeeeeeee! my turn! and I have evil plans!(evil laughter)...just read up to chap. 55 of the manga... must have more... grr... poor ling...and ran fan... grr... ok... here we go...

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**Chapter 5: This dog is _twisted..._**

Havoc strode cooly down the military corridoors. As he walked by other officers, luietenants, sergents and colonels he noticed that as her gave them a friendly wave, they would either smirk or laugh at him for some strange reason. Then Havoc felt something hitting his back foot. He turned around and looked both directions, confused. He then felt a tug on his military Jacket. In front of him was that fluffy little rabbit, tugging him along the hallways, chomping furiously on his carrot. Havoc looked down, wide eyes, noticing the rabbit. He was literally being pulled along the militay hallways by that little furry fluff ball. _That's an awfully strong rabbit..._ thought Havoc. The bunny pulled Havoc along the hallways until he came to a certain room. A lot of laughter and amusement was brought to others in the military to see Havoc being tugged along the building by a small cute furry bunny. The rabbit shut the doors behind Havoc, leaving him and itself in the room together.

Havoc looked around the room and slightly smiled. "You're pretty smart for a rabbit, aren't you?" he rubbed his hands under the bunny's ears. The bunny soaked up Havoc's love and smiled. The rabbit hopped away from Havoc and disappeared behind the corner. It came back a feww moments later, carrying a cup in his hands. He shoved the cup into Havoc's hands. Havoc looked down into the bottom of the cup. He saw a tea bag floating at the top over a pool of water. He looked quizzically at it and shrugged. " I haven't had Tea in a long time..." he whispered. He smiled and then brought the cup up to his lips and took in the warm liquid. It was very relaxing, too relaxing. It made him sleepy...

The rabbit smirked at the 2nd lueitenant infront of it. The bunny then slowly got up, revealing something that wasn't a bunny anymore. Long spiky green and blak hair sprung out from the rabbit's head. It's paws revealed black slip on gloves. It rose up revealing a slender muscular figure, hands on his hips with a look of satisfaction on his face. Envy smirked at the no-longer-human Havoc lying curled up in front of him. A fluffly blonde bunny lay curled up on the floor, his cigarette still hanging loosly out of his mouth. Envy smirked and took the cigarette out of his mouth and replaced it with a carrot. " Bunny's don't smoke..." he growled, stomping on the cigarette until all was left was ashes.

" One by one," Envy began saying to himself " We'll turn all pitiful humans into small helpless house pets until there's only Humunculi left!" he cackled and then left the room, transforming back into the rabbit, leaving a helpless Havoc, chewing on his carrot...

Al walked into the pet room, cats dogs and lizards cuped in his arms. He set them all down in the room, neatly when he head the phone ringing behind him. He walked over to the phone to pick it up " Hello? Central-" Al was cut off by the voice of Winry Rockbell " Al? Where's Ed? He should be here by now! Surely his automail is wrecked! I mean he's always getting in fights... what about you, Alphonse are you still in one peice? Could I talk to Ed?" she spoke very quickly, not leaving a breath in between sentences. " Winry!" Al exclaimed " Calm down. We're fine."

" Could I talk to Edward?" she asked more calmly. Al stoped to think for a moment. He hadn't seen Ed in a long time..." Al? Where's Ed?" Winry asked suspiciously. Al looked around, trying to think of an excuse " Well, um I, um, I don't know where he is... I mean he's not her right now!" he said frantically. Winry frowned across the other line and paused " YOU LOST HIM! OR DID HE LOSE YOU? HIS AUTOMAIL IS PROBABLY BLOWN UP BY NOW! YOU WAIT RIGHT THERE YOUNG MAN! WHEN I COME OVER THERE TOMORROW YOU TWO WILL BE IN BIG TROUBLE!" and with that, she slammed the phone down.

Alphonse looked at the phone wide- eyed and sighed. _I have to get rid of all these animals before Winry and Brother find them..._he slightly shuddered and turned around to see Hughes clutching the blonde kitten that he had found earlier that day.

" Oh! Mr. Hughes! an I help you with anything?" Hughes smiled brightly " Al! Yes! I was just wondering if you culd do me a favour..." He then dug for his pocket. His hand came out of it realing a nmber of photographs. " I was wondering if I could take this cat home and theat shrimp..." Al sighed happily, at least that would help him get rid of some of the animals " Of course... go ahead! you can take-" Al was cut off by Hughes shoving pictures in her face.

" My daughter, Elicia just _loves _ animals! Isn't she the cutest little girl you've ever seen?" Ed looked at Al in confusion. Why was he getting rid of his animals so freely? _No I'll have to stay with that goof ball... ugh... and with Mustang on top of it...well at least I'll be able to call him "shrimp"... maybe this won't be so bad after all..._

Rixa entered the room " Hughes, you said you wanted to see me?" Roy looked up from the fish bowl for the first time that day, he smiled.

" Oh, Riza... I just wold like to invite you to dinner tonight." Riza looked quizically at him " What for?" Hughes sighed " Well... It's a surprise..." Riza rolled her eyes.

" Well... I don't have anything better to do..." Hughes smiled " Oh, could you bring Black Hayate? Elicia _loves _that dog..." Riza smiled and nodded " I'll see you then, Maes..." she waved to him and left the room.

Hughes smiled " I just hope Roy shows up..." Roy looked over at Maes and gulped _No! I forgot... so that's why he wanted me to go to his place... to set me up on a date... I'm perfectly capable to ask her out on my own to a date, Maes... _Roy thought, stubbornly _She's going to go there for nothing... WHY THE HELL DID THIS HAPPEN!_ he slammed his fist againt the glass tank and did a scream that only turned to bubbles.

Ed looked over at Roy, unimpressed. Roy just glared bak at him.

" Well Al, I better get going..." Hughes sighed, ending the conversation. He picked up The tank that Roy was in and Ed. " You two are going to _love_ Elicia... I mean, who wouldn't... He started humming a tune and took the two animals into his car and to his house...

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**Later that night...**

"Papa!" laughed Elicia, hugging Ed up to her chest " I wove him!" Hughes smiled as he watched his daughter play with the kitten. Roy looked blankly at Ed being swung bak and forth by the cute little girl.

" What about the shrimp, Elicia?" asked Gracia, coming into the room. Elicia set Ed down carefully and walked up to the tank and peered into the water. " It looks funny!" the Elicia burst out laughing. Roy jus glared at Elicia, which caused her to laugh even more. Roy shook his fist at her and started shouting something that only came out as a chorus of bubbles. Elicia was now rolling around the floor in giggles " I wove him too!" Roy stopped shaking his fist at her and slghtly smiled "wove" ... no one had woved him in a long time... or at least they didn't say that...

_Ding Dong_

Riza waited at the door patiently, Blake Hayate at her side, it's tounge sticking out of the side of it's mouth. Gracia came to open the door " Oh! Hello Gracia!" came the voice of Riza. Roy gulped. She a tually showed up... _what am I going to do? They can't find out who I am, bu if they don't then will they forgive me for not showing and Riza... wove... what the hell am I thinking?_

" So, " began Ed, " this isn't _too_ bad, is it, _shrimp?" _ Ed began cackling, but stopped when he heard mumbling from somewhere " I like my girl... Riza Hawkeye's my girl... I like the way she moves... I like her body... I love my girl, Riza, Riza Hawkeye..." Ed and Roy's eyes widened as Black Hayate said these things as he passed by.

" This- dog- is- _twisted_.." shuddered Ed, his eye slightly twitching.

Roy nodded in agreement " Ooohh... yeah..."

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I luved writing that black hayate part... i told you i was evil! i was laughing so hrd when I wrote this... my favourite chapter that I've written yet... tell me whatcha think and I hope Ursula has fun with the next chapter... (evil laughter) tee hee... ta-ta for now!


	6. Chapter 6

Hughes glanced at the clock, worriedly. It was eleven o'clock PM and Roy still hadn't shown up. Had he forgotten? Was he not interested? Or was he just being a jack ass? He hoped that none of those were the reasons why the Colonel was so late._ Riza must be heart broken... _Hughes thought, sadly.

She did look miserable behind the fake smile she was using as a mask. When he had told her that Roy was also coming to dinner she had nearly lifted off the ground with happiness. Of course, she had hidden it behind that serious expression of hers. She seemed to hide everything and shoved all her emotions aside to make others happy.

Roy the shrimp watched Riza from his tank. He fidgetted and squirmed thinking of what she might be thinking. He hoped she didn't hate him... But was it really his fault for being a shrimp on the night of Hughes' little dinner party? _I'm sure if I just explain things when everything goes back to normal, she'll understand... Right?_ He thought.

Edward the cat gave the Colonel a confused look. Why did he look so nervous? He shrugged it off and looked back at the "twisted" dog, Black Hayate, that was sitting by Riza's chair staring up at her. Ed had been staring at that mut all night. It was odd to listen to it, "I love my mistress... Riza Hawkeye's my woman... I love her... I want her... She's all mine and I'm all hers... She's perfect." It reminded of what he had heard Roy mummbling in his sleep once, only creepier.

_"This dog is sooooooo twisted._ How can Riza live with him?_"_ Ed muttered, shivering. The moment the word "Riza" left Ed's lips, Black Hayate turned toward Edward. The cat stiffened and the fur on the back of his neck prickled. Something bad was going to happen. He could feel it in the air.

Like a flash of black and white lightning, Black Hayate had Ed pinned onto his back. Ed struggled and hissed trying to break free of the dog's grip, but it was much stronger than he was. Black Hayate pressed his nose against Ed's.

"What did you say about my girl?" He growled. Ed shivered. _Twisted..._ he thought.

"N-nothing," Ed squirmed. "Nothing at all!" He had this queezy feeling in his stomach that told him that if he told the truth he'd get his nose torn off.

"Good," And with that Black Hayate trotted back to his owner's side.

Roy had turned his attention to Ed and Black Hayate when the fight had broken out and was still staring bug-eyed at the dog. After a moment he shook his head and looked over at Ed who was still flat on his back.

"What's wrong? _Dog_ got your tounge?" he laughed. Ed shot his a cold glare and rolled onto his front.

"Well, I want to see how you take tackled by that crazy mut," He huffed. Roy was still laughing when he realised that Riza was heading for the door.

"Oh c'mon, Riza, just stay for a little longer. I'm sure he'll be here any minute!" Hughes tried to stop his guest from leaving.

"No thank you, Maes. I need to be getting home now. Thank you for the dinner, I had a nice time." Riza said, opening the front door.

"No! Riza! Wait, don't go!" Roy hollared. But she couldn't hear his cries and left with Black Hayate at her heals, leaving a heart broken Mustang behind.

------------------

The next day...

The train from Resembool arrived at Central station. A fuming Winry Rockbell stepped off the train and practically ran out of the station. She ran all the way to the Central Military H.Q, cursing under her breath all the way.

"Ughhh... Edward when I find you I'm gonna kick your ass!"

-----------------------------------

Another short chapter by me! But I got it done and that's what counts, right! The black Hayate part was the best... Lol!


	7. Chapter 7

sorry for long update people! so here I go! yay!

**Tea Time**

**Chapter 7: The Scar**

"ALPHONSE!" Winry hollared through the military headquarter offices " WHERE ARE YOU!" as she walked by people in the building they all gave her strange looks that said: "be quite, will ya?" and she just glared back at them that said: "make me."

Al hid behind the closest wall or any type of obejct that would cover his larger armour shell so he could try and hide from Winry. Al had looked everywhere for Ed, but couldn't find him. Then Al gulped in fear.

" There you are..." Winry glared evilly at Al as she held a wrench in her hand. Al tried to close his eyes and put his hands over his face to try and protect himself "P-p-p please don't kil me!" he said, his voice quivering in fear. Winry just looked at Al strangly and threw her wrench onto the ground "So," she said, serious at first " What's zup?"

XXXXXXXXX

A dark man with round dark shades that shimmered by the sun's bright shine stood in the middle of a sand- filled land. He wore baggy colthes that flowed in the wind. A scar was engraved across his face in a shape of an "X". He glared at the person-_thing _facing him. His fist was clenched tightly.

"YOU WERE THE DEMON FROM HELL THAT ERRUPTED THE DREADFUL MASSACRE OF ISHBAL!" he yelled manically, his clothes still flowing in the wind. Envy looked up from the table he was sitting at, setting his cup of coffe back down onto the table.

"Sorry, what was that?" Envy said cooly, the frown on his face slightly up-turned.

" YOU ARE THE REASON ISHABAL HAS BEEN DIMOLISHED FROM EXISTANCE!" Scar yelled manically again, his colthes _still_ flowing in the wind. Envy just looked over at Scar, shrugged his shoulders and continued to drink his cup of coffee. Scar blinked a few times and looked at Envy confused; by this point his clothes had stopped flowing in the wind.

"..."

" NOW! **DIE!**" hollared Scar, being manic once again, his clothes flowing in the wind once more. Scar opened his clenches fist and directed in straight at Envy, he ran straight towards Envy, no chance of stoping at any cost. Many red and other pretty colored electric currents injected from Scar's hand as he ran towards Envy. Just when Scar was about to blow Envy to bits-

" Want some tea?" Envy asked cutely, with a small smile.

" Hell yeah!" Scar said excitedly and sat down next to Envy. Envy set the tea cup in front of Scar. Scar smiled and put his two hands together underneath his chin.

" Dear Ishbal," Scar began "We are here today to drink this holy tea that you have prepared for us. Thank you. Amen." Scar smiled and picked up his tea and brought the hot liquid to the surface of his lips.

"Mmmm... good..." Scar sighed, setting the tea back down in front of him " I haven't had tea in ages... did that feel good or what..." and with that, Scar fell down off his chair, and onto the floor.

" Yay!" Envy said delighted " It worked!" then he pulled out a mirror from his pocket and looked at himself lovingly " Yes Envy! You're a **sexy beast**!"

XXXXXXX

" Would you quit it with that mirror already?" Lust asked annoyed after Envy had been admiring himself for over half an hour.

Lust glaned over at the spot where Scar had sat before. There was a small white mouse, cuddled up in a deep sleep. Lust shrugged and turned back to Envy.

"Hey." she said, wacking Envy over the head to get his attention "Have you seen that guy with the scar and the sun glasses that blows people up?" Envy gulped. He didn't want to be on Lust's bad side. definitely not.

" Why do you ask?" Envy said suspiciously, trying to pick his words carefully.

"Well I'm suposed to be on a date with him right now..." she said, with a dissapointed look on her face. " besides, that's none of you're buisness!" Envy rolled his eyes and quickly glanced at the small, snow-white mouse and shruged his shoulders.

"Nope. Haven't seen him."

Lust sighed deeply and walked away, leaving Envy alone with a mouse scar. Once Lust was out of sight, Envy pulled out his mirror again to admired himself _again._

" Yay!" he said, delighted " I tricked her!" He glanced over at the small mouse in the seat and smiled evilly " Envy... you are such a genius! Yes you are! Yes you are!"

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" WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU STILL DON'T KNOW WHERE EDWARD IS!" hollared Winry, wacking Alphonse in the head, hard with her wrench.

" Well..." Al began " I think, according to my calculations- I've come up with a conclusion!"

"Which is...?"

" I think Ed got turned into a cat..."

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Muhahahahahahah! **I just luv scar! ** tee hee! This was so fun to write and so quick and so easy! I luff it! So hope you like it! It's your turn again, ursula!... yes, Scar is explosively crazy and Envy loves himself... review please! thank you!


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